Men’s Health

The Case for Masturbation Over Casual Sex…

I don’t often post things from a serious perspective. But, I’ve got some things on my mind that I wanted to share… Just stick with me!

You may not know it from my thoughts and musings, but I am a monogamous, 30-something, single mom. I bet you never would’ve guessed that I would be posting blogs for a sex shop. But, I happen to know a LOT about sex because I’ve always had very adventurous partners. In fact, my friends always call me a “monogamous freak”. It fits. So, trust me when I post something. I know what I am talking about… usually… unless it’s like, bestiality or necrophilia or something… NOT MY THING!!!

I think I’ve made the point before that I am very selective about who I have sex with, due to being a monogamous, 30-something, single mom… (and well, there’s this post that explains some more things about me). I have to be careful – for my child’s sake. In my opinion, I have to stay healthy and whole in order to be a good parent. And therefore, I do not risk my physical or emotional well-being for sex’s sake. I’m not a prude. Don’t get me wrong – I have slipped up from time to time and  have had sex outside of a relationship. I just think it’s dangerous territory for me. So, I don’t do it. It’s never gone right. I end up disappointed because of the sex.

Why? Repeat after me… Sex is just a temporary physical act… It does not equal love. It does not make up for the things you lack in life. It only feels good while you’re doing it. And it can be downright disappointing physically and/or emotionally, if it’s not done right!

Sex feels good. Oh yes, it does! When your lover circles your pussy with his cock, then plunges in after what seems like forever, it feels like heaven on Earth. It’s like, the best thing EVER! And sex is good for you, too. It relaxes you. It has a bunch of proven health benefits, like headache and blood pressure reduction. Hell, it even burns calories!! Shit… forget your diet and have sex 4 times a day! You’ll look and feel awesome. But, I know that in order to feel good about my own sexual decisions, I have to feel good about the person I am being intimate with… When I don’t feel good about it, I always end up regretting it.

I bet you’re wondering at this point, “why is she even posting this? What a buzz kill!!” Right? I am writing this because I want you to remember you are a bar of gold. You are a valuable commodity. You’re body is your temple, and you do not want to disrespect your temple. Repeat after me… Sex is just a temporary physical act… STD’s can be forever. Dick-bag boyfriends, or crazy girlfriends, can cause permanent damage. Is that temporary feeling of ecstasy worth it? Sometimes, it might be worth it. Sometimes…

For all those other times, fuck yourself. Masturbate. Take care of your own business. Hell, I know there have been times where I WISH I had masturbated instead of hooking up, either because the sex was lame or the emotional impact was too draining. Listen to me!!! Liberate yourself by taking charge of your own sexual pleasure. Why?

  • Masturbation will put your needs first
  • Masturbation will never give you an STD
  • Masturbation will never cheat on you
  • Masturbation will always let you cum first
  • Masturbation will never lie to you
  • Masturbation will never hurt your feelings
  • Masturbation will never waste your time
  • Masturbation will never make promises it can’t keep

Need more reasons? Here’s scientific reasons to pass on the meaningless sex and stick with the self-pleasure:

  • Masturbation helps you sleep
  • Masturbation relieves cramps and stress
  • Masturbation has been shown to prevent prostate cancer and alleviate UTI’s
  • Masturbation boosts your immunity
  • Masturbation has been shown to improve your mood
  • Masturbation tones pelvic and anal muscles
  • Masturbation lowers Risk Of Type 2 Diabetes

So, skip the dick-bags and the crazy bitches from time to time. Instead, check out our selection of solo toys and make yourself happy!

For the boys – Click Here!  For the gals – Click Here!

 

Lube 101: The Do’s and Dont’s of Lubrication

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Lube can be a great addition to your sex life. It can enhance the pleasurable sensations of sex and masturbation. Lube can also aid with vaginal dryness or discomfort. It can also provide flavor during oral sex, which also increase salivation. Plus, when used with condoms, lube increases pleasure for both partners and decreases the risk of condom breakage.

The three main types of lube are:

  • Water-Based – Water-based lubes rinse off easily from skin and fabric. They are generally cheaper and easier to find than silicone-based lube. And, they are less likely to cause yeast infections.
  • Silicone-Based – Silicone lubes are oil-based, last longer than water-based lube, and are best for anal sex.
  • Flavored – Flavored lubes are usually a water-based lube with flavor added. They can come in a huge variety of flavors and are best for oral sex, especially when using a condom.

Do’s and Don’ts with lubrication:

DO: Know how to use lube. Add a drop inside the condom before sex to increase sensation for the man. Add a few drops to the outside of the condom to reduce friction and breakage. Reapply as needed.

DON’T: Use flavored lube that contains sugar for vaginal sex. The sugars in some flavored lube can cause yeast infections. Make sure you purchase a flavored lube that is sugar-free, if you plan to use it for vaginal sex.

DON’T: Use an oil-based product as lube with condoms or sex-toys. Oil-based products rapidly degrade latex condoms and many of the materials sex-toys are made of! Oil-based products include Vaseline, baby oil, olive oil, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, and hand or body lotion. As a rule of thumb, do not use any cooking or beauty products as lube; only use products specifically designed for sex.

DO: Use lube for anal sex…. every time! Lube is a must for anal sex. Since the anus is not self-lubricating, anal sex without lube is painful and risky. Friction during anal sex can cause tears to the tissue, increasing risk of STIs, including HIV. To reduce tearing and increase pleasure, apply lube (and a condom) before penetration, and reapply as needed.

DO: Use silicone-based lube during anal sex. Because the anus and rectum absorb water, silicone-based lube lasts longer than water-based lube. If the only lube available to you is water-based lube, use it and reapply often.

And as always, we carry a HUGE selection of brands and styles of lubes: water-based, silicone, flavored, gel, organic, warming, cooling, stimulating, couple’s, hybrid, and more!

http://thereddoorstore.com/index.php/lotions-and-potions/lubes

Penis Pumps 101… by Danny Z

These days, I find myself getting more and more questions about our penis pumps. I am not happy about the narrow-mindedness most of the questions, though. It seems that most customers believe pumps are “for people with problems”. However, that is not always the case. To me, it’s like saying people who use straws when they drink must have neck problems. Using a penis pump doesn’t mean you have a problem. Maybe you do. But maybe, you just like the fullness it brings to your erection. Or, perhaps you just like the sucking sensation.

Yes, people who have erectile dysfunction, blood pressure problems, or diabetes can use the pumps to achieve and maintain an erection. Maybe you’re saying to yourself, “I don’t have any of those issues. Why would I want to use a pump?” Well, penis pumps will actually help ANY penis reach max potential in length and thickness. Don’t get me wrong… it won’t make your penis bigger. BUT, it will make it the biggest it can be… and that is always a plus!

How can a penis pump help you reach max potential? It does so by gently sucking on the penis, therefore increasing blood flow to the penis. So basically, it enhances the natural process that causes erections in the first place. The increased blood flow is maintained with the use of a cock ring, which you slide on after you remove the pump. This restricts the blood from leaving the penis, and maintains the girth effect pumps provide. The rings are used during intercourse or masturbation, and will help you last longer and cum bigger. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never complained about an orgasm being too powerful! So, that’s a side effect of using penis pumps that I am completely ok with…

Now, let’s talk about how you actually use a penis pump. First, I suggest getting a little aroused. Then, slip the cock ring down your shaft with the help of your favorite water based lubricant. Next, place a little bit of water based lube on the rim of the penis pump. This will help ease of entry. Then, slide your penis into the shaft of the pump and make sure it fits securely. Start squeezing the pump, slowly at first until you get used to the sensation. There will be a slight feeling of restriction. But if there is any discomfort, ease off the pumping or stop completely. In other words, be cautious when pumping. Pumps restrict and contract the veins in the penis. If you get over zealous, there is a possibility of injury. Be safe and play nice. Once you have pump your penis to your desired erection, slide out gently! If you want to remove the cock ring, simply slide it off. It’s easier to get off with the aid of a little lube. Otherwise, leave it on the cock ring and have at it!

I hope you give one of our penis pumps a try. It’s not for everyone. But, it can bring another dimension to your sex life or masturbation time. So, pump it up and get it on!

Suggested Pumps:

I like anything from the Pump Worx line by Pipedream. They are reasonably priced and of good quality. They also offer a large variety of pumps that offer different sensations and functions like vibration.

I’m also a fan of the James Deen brand pump. It is also reasonably priced and of good quality. Plus, it has a gauge to help you remember your desired level of pressure.

Also, check out our pump selection online! http://thereddoorstore.com/index.php/fun-with-toys/pumps/mens-pumps

You Put Your Junk In It… by Danny Z

I feel as though I was raised in a macho-man bubble as a child. Every time I saw a man in the media, he would always be a MANLY… the kind of men who wore boxers and would never purchase sexy underwear for fear of embarrassment. But, as I have gotten older, I realize wearing sexy man underwear is not such a bad thing.

Which brings me to my point of discussion… We carry men’s underwear in the store. I have always been a little curious about some of the styles.  Recently, I was fortunate enough to be given a pair of these “designer” underwear as a gift. They were a pair of our Andrew Christian briefs. I was anxious to try them on, as I have always been a die-hard boxer man. But, I have heard a lot of positive things about them from customers.

Here are my thoughts about them… The briefs are created from a very comfortable, silky smooth cotton blend. They’re a LOT more comfortable than the regular packaged boxers that I usually purchase. The pair I received have a pouch for the penis. The pouch is designed to separate the shaft from the testicles. The separation increases blood flow to the shaft, making my penis look thicker and longer. The briefs also hug tightly to my testicles, creating a more form-enhancing fit and giving me some swing control. While the pouch was a little weird at first, it took me very little time for me to get uses to the feeling. By having the pouch, it helps my penis avoid having to pick which pant leg it would it would like to hang out in for the day! Instead, it rests comfortably upfront, like a proud trophy.

At this point, you guys may be skeptical. But, I love the way they feel. I can sit for hours, without the constant leg shakes or thrust ups to keep my genitals comfortable. And, there are a lot of times I wear jeans or dress pants that, ahem, make my privates a little more public. These are my go to underwear for times like that. They actually make my pants fit better!

Whether you want to feel sexy, more in control of your manhood, or just want a better profile in your pants, you should try one of our many styles of men’s underwear. From boxer-briefs to briefs to thongs, we have something for all you manly men! I promise you will be pleasantly surprised… and so will that special someone in your life!

BDSM 101: Kinky Basics for Everyone

bdsm-tflMaybe you already know what BDSM is, and going a little further intrigues you. Perhaps you’ve dabbled with spanking your partner. Or, maybe you’ve tied each other up with scarves. But now, you want to try more BDSM fun in the bedroom.

Or, maybe you’ve never heard of BDSM. Perhaps, you’re intimidated by the idea. Or, maybe you just don’t know how to get started, but would be interested in trying something like this in the bedroom.

Well, this is your primer for BDSM. I’m going to give you some basic ideas to get your kinky juices flowing!

First of all, let’s define BDSM:

B = bondage – using restraints as part of an intimate relationship

D = domination – a dominant partner controlling and/or punishing a submissive partner

S & M = sadism and masochism – giving (s) and receiving (m) pleasure from pain

Getting started… When getting started with any BDSM activity, talk to your partner FIRST! Discuss what you would like to try and come up with a game plan. It’s important to set up boundaries before you ever venture down this road. Why? It’s because many BDSM activities require a high level of trust between partners. So, talk, talk, talk about what you will and won’t do! Then, decide on a safe word, or code word, to use with your partner when you want things to stop. Remember, it’s ok to stop and regroup. You should never feel like you can’t trust your partner!

Now, let’s break everything down. I’m going to give you some basic ideas according to where they fall in the BDSM spectrum. Some of them might not be your thing, and that’s ok! The idea is to spice things up within YOUR comfort zone.

Bondage – There are so many easy ways to incorporate bondage into your sex life!

  • Grab a leash and walk your partner around the bedroom
  • Use furry handcuffs or silk rope to restrict your partner’s use of their hands, or to lock them to a bedpost or chair
  • Try a ball gag to muffle your partner’s pleas for mercy or cries of ecstasy
  • Use a spreader bar to restrict the use of your partner’s legs
  • Go all the way and use hog ties or wrist and leg cuffs to completely restrict your partner’s movements

Domination – This is all about one person being in charge, with the other relinquishing control.

  • Pretend your partner is your love slave and have them work to earn their freedom by doing anything you say
  • Control your partner by repeatedly stimulating them, but not allowing them to have an orgasm
  • Role play having one of you be the servant (think French maid, pool boy, love robot, etc.)
  • Try a remote controlled panty vibe where you or your partner is in charge of the amount of stimulation received
  • Use a blindfold and do not allow your partner to see what you’re about to do next

S&M – This is all about giving and/or receiving pain. But, it doesn’t mean you have to hurt each other. Start on the softer side with any of these suggestions and work your way up to more intensity!

  • Try using nipple clamps for an exciting pinch
  • Pick up a paddle, riding crop, or leather flogger, then lightly smack each other on sensitive areas
  • Drip hot wax onto each other’s backsides
  • Try an electro-stimulation kit on sensitive areas with the dial set to low
  • Use your teeth to gently bite sensitive areas

Want to try some of the ideas above? Check out our BDSM selection online. You’ll find many items to help you get started.

Want to try some harder stuff? Do your research! Talk to your partner about your desires AND boundaries. And, the visit one of our 3 Charlotte are stores. We have a much larger, and kinkier, selection of BDSM items in-store.

 

Oral Sex 101: Tips for Great Oral!

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Oral sex… *Sigh*

If you’re anything like me, you’ve had a man boast that he is awesome at going down. He raves about the compliments he’s received in the past. But, when he starts pleasuring you, it either feels like a beaver gnawing on your privates or like a Dyson has locked on to your clit! Or for you guys, there’s the girl who boasts of her skills in sucking dick. But when she’s down there, she barely moves her lips and throat around your shaft, and mostly uses her hands. Or, she really sucks… like s Dyson has locked on to your dick!

I know that everyone likes something different when it comes to getting off. Maybe you like the above oral sex techniques. I’m not judging… But, listen up all you Dyson-mouthed folks! When done with some skill and attention, oral sex can be a much more amazing experience than the ones I’ve had above! So, here are my tips on how to give great oral sex…

These tips are for everyone:

1. Start fresh! A shower can go a long way in making oral much more pleasant for the giver! And if you’re receiving the oral, being clean will make you more comfortable and at ease.

2. Communicate! Tell your partner up front what you like and don’t like. During the oral, give encouragement or softly spoken suggestions. Moaning and groaning works, too!

3. Reciprocate! Reciprocate! Reciprocate! If you don’t like to give, it really discourages your partner from wanting to give. So, do unto to others as you would have done to you!

 

If you’re going down on her:

1. Slow down! It’s not a race! Warp speed tongue action does nothing but frustrate the average women. And most likely, a steady build will create a much more intense orgasm for her.

2. Don’t munch the rug! Teeth are ok… but that means a little nibble here or there. Repetitive gnawing is not really a pleasurable feeling for most women.

3. Yes, sucking on my clit is a pleasurable feeling… when done lightly! Don’t go all Dyson on me!

4. Don’t like to go down because of the “taste”? Well that’s not fair. Consider using a flavored lube and get to licking! Not only will it taste good to you, it actually enhances the feeling for me.

5. Apply a little pressure. Light licks will tease me. Mixing in firmer licks will get me there.

 

If you’re going down on him:

1. Take him deeply into your mouth and stroke up and down, allowing him to feel the back of your throat. I know this seems basic. But, many of us who give blow-jobs end up focusing solely on the head of the penis. That can be too intense or frustrating for a man. Think of your mouth as a vagina. How would a man use his penis in vagina? Would he just poke the tip in repeatedly? NO! He goes all in and then almost all out. Do the same with your mouth!

2. Don’t be a Dyson. Lightly sucking, yes. Creating an oral vortex, no. Sucking dick doesn’t mean literally turning your mouth into a vacuum.

3. Try a little flavored lube. If you’re like me, sometimes your mouth gets dry. A dry mouth is no fun for anyone. Using lube will keep the moisture up and the friction down.

4. Some guys like a little teeth. Gently graze the back side of his shaft with your teeth. But, don’t go all cheese grater on him!

5. Use your tongue. Running the tongue along the back of his shaft and the head of his penis adds that extra wow factor. Also, using your tongue to gently apply pressure as you move up and down can create a tighter feel for him.

 

Read these tips! Study them! Master them! Don’t be that person who boasts of your skills, but disappoints in the bedroom. Don’t be the beaver gnawing away or the Dyson set to VORTEX. Just don’t. 🙂

 

Super Penis – by Danny Z

Danny Z is a store employee who will be joining our blog from time to time. He’s here to give you the male perspective on products and sex! Read what he recently had to say about our male enhancement pills…

I’ve been working at the RedDoor for two years now. I recall my first few shifts in the store… Men would walk in and request one of our many “male enhancement pills.” I am a very skeptical person at heart. But, I was very curious as to why we sell dozens of these pills a day. At that time, I was ignorant about the product and didn’t grasp the concept of male enhancement pills. No one had educated me on their effects or benefits. Furthermore, the men who came in to purchase them were secretive about it, as if they found a gold mine and wanted to have all the treasure for themselves. After a while I got warmed up to the idea of trying one, but kept making excuses to avoid actually taking the plunge. One particular day, a regular customer came into the store to purchase a supplement, and I had to tell him we were sold out of his brand of choice. I watched him pace back and forth debating on how to “salvage” his evening. After a few spins, he called the lady he was supposed to meet up with to inform her that he was “too tired” and wanted to go home. This blew my mind! As a single male, that is something we just don’t do. The reaction the guy had blew my mind and I immediately purchased my first male supplement.

I had knowledge of what the supplements did, prior to taking them. Basically, they stay in your system for an X amount of days, depending on the dosage. During that time, they help with ease of arousal, maintain erections, create fuller erections, allow for quicker reload time, and increase the longevity of your sessions. I’ve heard at least a hundred or so men refer to this as “the superman pill.” Why, you may ask? As men, we all know things can hinder your erection – being too hot, having to pee, being tired, being nervous, or honestly just not being turned on. Penises are very strange organs. I can now speak from personal experience that NONE of those issues were present during use of the supplement.

Here’s what happened my first time… I took one 30 mins prior to heading over to my female friend’s house. As I felt the pill kicking in, I had slight thoughts of perversion. I met her at her house and put on my moves… or so I would like to think! Pretty soon, we started going at it. It was hot (temperature-wise), yet I lasted for 3 and a half hours of full action. There were no breaks. My penis did not give up or break down. I was dripping with sweat by the end of it, and my “friend” was as cool as could be. I was completely enthralled by the supplement. I couldn’t believe it. Eventually, I finished… after she had multiple orgasms. She laid there in bliss as I went to clean myself off. But within seconds, I was back at full mast and completely “ready” to go… AGAIN. The re-load time utterly shocked me… AND HER! I usually need about 30 minutes to recover and reload. But, this enhancement cut my reload time down greatly. Still to this day, I am amazed by the effects…

Long story short, I highly suggest you try one and make up your own mind… I know I am a believer!

Sexual Fantasies and XXX Daydreaming

So, I am 100% pro-fantasy. In fact, if you could read my mind, you’d see I fantasize a LOT! Sometimes, it’s like there’s a XXX movie playing in my head. I’m a creative person. Maybe that’s why I’m constantly coming up with scenarios for my sex life. It frustrates Mr. Big, my partner. I’ve heard him say on more than one occasion, “It’s like the Rolling Stones, honey… we can’t play all our greatest hits in one night!!!” Bless his heart. I think I exhaust him…

I know not all of my fantasies can or will come true. But, it never hurts to dream… right?

Like for instance, I was in training the other day and this cute, butch woman was leading the training. What did I do? I spent part of the class fantasizing about pussy grinding… PUSSY GRINDING. What did I take away from the class? That I want to pussy grind as soon as possible. I want to find a hot woman, get naked, and rub against her. Yep.

Or, the other night, Mr. Big was talking about watching the series OZ, a prison drama that HBO produced a decade ago. What did I do? I started fantasizing about some big, buff prison thug making my lover his bitch. In this fantasy, I am the prison warden, watching it all play out, waiting for my turn with the billy club…. Mr. Big was not entirely thrilled with my fantasy, but he was amused.

What’s wrong with these little mini-pornos running through my mind from time to time? Well, other than not having enough time, energy or partner, there’s nothing wrong with a little fantasizing!

Everyone has sexual fantasies, from the mundane to the down right freak-a-licious! Think about it… Most of you have had fantasies about having sex in a public place like a bathroom or the hood of a car. Lots of you have had fantasies of threesomes or watching your partner have sex with someone else. A lot of women fantasize about girl-on-girl. We’re human. We daydream. And, fantasies are healthy. They can increase your arousal during sex. Plus, fantasies allow you to do things you would not do in real life, and the outcome is always positive. It’s a win-win!

So, you don’t want to keep daydreaming like me? Then you may be asking yourself, “how do I make my fantasies come true?” I can’t tell you a step-by-step for every fantasy you may have. There’s honestly not enough blog space for just MY fantasies. And, keep in mind that I am not a licensed couple’s counselor, nor a sex therapist. But, I can help you open up the dialogue with your partner. Here’s my advice:

Test the waters – Start by showing your partner a porn with a scenario you’d like to act out. Then, ask them what they think of that scenario. Your partner should be pretty honest with you about it under those circumstances, and you’ll be able to gauge whether revealing more is a possibility. You could also present your fantasy as a wild dream you had and see how your partner reacts. Or, ask them to visit a sex shop with you and see what they gravitate towards.

Ease it into conversation SLOWLY – I think it’s best to start small. In my opinion, you should never go for a full reveal if you don’t think your partner is that adventurous. In other words, if you want to reveal your ideas, don’t do it all at once. You may intimidate, scare, or alienate your partner by rushing things. If you think your partner is open to a threesome, ask them what would turn them on about the fantasy. Getting them to open up to you will make it easier for you to discuss your ideas.

The theme here is communication! You honestly will never know unless you ask. Once you begin having these conversation with your partner, you open the door to a greater level of sexual creativity between the two of you!

Say WHAT? 10 Strange Sex Laws You Won’t Believe!

I’m sure I’ve broken a few laws during sex – laws of nature, laws of physics, laws of thermodynamics… Hell, this girl can get really freaky when she feels like it. But, there are some pretty crazy laws in various states that could actually land you in jail! I’m pretty sure I’ve never broken any of THESE laws… Maybe you have?

CALIFORNIA – Anyone having intercourse with Satan must use a condom… Well, best to play it safe with SATAN! You don’t know who or WHAT he’s been having sex with down there in Hell…

FLORIDA – Sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal… Uhm, ok. Wouldn’t that hurt? And besides, there are other kinds of pricks in this world!

GEORGIA – It is illegal to purchase or possess marital aides (vibrators, dildos, etc.)… OOPS! We’d be in trouble! Major, major trouble. I guess there are some things I am willing to go to jail for…

ILLINOIS – Nuzzling or kissing a reptile is prohibited… Well, stay away from the players at the bar because they tend to be total snakes…

PENNSYLVANIA – It is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a toll booth… I just wonder if you have to pay for that in exact change…

KANSAS – Anyone caught engaging in anal sex draws a maximum sentence of six months in jail… Hmmm… What If you were in jail when you got caught?

VIRGINIA – It is illegal to copulate in any position except missionary or have sex with the lights on… Oooh! Be a rebel and have sex doggy style in the dark, because that’s so sick and twisted *eyeroll*…

WEST VIRGINIA – It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs… UHM, say WHAT?! As if a smaller animal makes it any better…

ARKANSAS – Moose are not allowed to have sex on city streets… Well, you’re damn skippy they shouldn’t! Who wants to see that?

RHODE ISLAND – Oral sex is considered “abominable, detestable crime against nature,” and such activity brings a 7-to-10-year stretch in the penitentiary… Shit. Sometimes when I am down there, it FEELS like a 7-to-10-year stretch…

 

So, if  you feel like breaking any laws, you BETTER make it worth it! Hit up the RedDoor before you commit the crime and go down with a blaze of sexy glory!

The Business of Ohs

When people find out what I do for a living, they have two reactions: “OH, er, uhm…” or “Ohhhh! That sounds like a fun job”. And to be honest, my job is FULL of oh’s… So their reaction is fitting. But, you may wonder what it’s actually like to work in a sex shop. I bet that based on those two reactions, you have the wrong idea.

Let’s address the first kind of “OH”. That’s the reaction I get from folks who are sketched out by sex… the ones who are scared to talk about it out loud. That’s the response I get from people too embarrassed to actually shop in person at a sex store. And therein lies the misconception that produces that kind of “OH”, the wide-eyes and awkward moment, dropped like a lead balloon on my feet kind of “OH”. It’s ok to be private about your sex life. I’m not saying that you should be wildly open about it. But sex itself, or working in a sex shop, should in fact NOT be embarrassing or awkward. They shouldn’t be because sex is a natural thing. It’s a wonderful thing when shared between two people who care about each other. And even if they don’t care about each other, it can still be a tremendously fun activity. Finding ways to please yourself and/or your partner should not be a bad thing. Helping you discover those ways is part of my job. It actually makes me feel good to help you feel good. I find it fulfilling. So do my coworkers.

And what about that second kind of “Ohhhhh”? Well, yes, it is a fun job. But, it’s not ALL fun and games. I take it seriously. Many people come in because they don’t know how to achieve pleasure. They are unhappy in their sex lives and really want help. That’s no fun for them at all. Those kinds of situations require more tact and sensitivity than fun… Or they come in because they have erectile dysfunction… Or they’ve had a female or male related cancer and are experiencing issues with sexual intercourse. Those are delicate situations that I don’t handle with fun. I handle them with compassion and care. The bottom line is that you encounter so many types of people, with a huge variety of desires, needs, and wants. You can’t always assume that it’s all fun and games.

It’s a very HUMAN job, where people are open about their most basic needs, wants, and desires. We’re dealing with such a private aspect of our customers’ lives. We want everyone to feel comfortable in our store – whether they are in happy or unhappy, open or closed,  or worried or secure in their sex lives. And yes… it is often fun, because sex SHOULD be fun and enjoyable. So, let’s throw those other “ohs” out the window! Let’s focus on “ohs” I like to hear… because in this business, we’re definitely about the o’s…