Things just haven’t worked out for me the way I imagined they would in the romance department. So, I am single and spend a fair amount of time thinking about what I do and don’t want out of a partner. Sex is a very important part of who I am. So that means I want and need a partner that I am extremely attracted to, passionate about, and sexually compatible with in. And so for me, a huge part of a successful relationship would include a great sex life.
So, what are the things that make up a great sex life? I’ve given this a lot of thought and here’s my list:
1. COMMUNICATION – If you can’t talk about sex, I don’t think you can have a decent sex life! You should be able to tell your partner what you like and don’t like. If you need something more, you should be able to share your needs with your partner. If you want to explore something new, you should be able to share your desires. All of these things won’t happen if the communication is bad in your relationship. So, you need to feel comfortable being able to talk openly and honestly about your sex life! But beyond that, you need to be able to speak the language of sex. If you are afraid to say penis, vagina, clitoris, foreplay, etc., how are you going to ever explain what feels good to you?
2. FOREPLAY – Working each other up into a frenzy can go a long way in creating a great sex life. For starters, it gets the blood flowing in your erogenous zones. This will increase stimulation during actual intercourse. Also, for women, prolonged foreplay is often the only way they achieve orgasm, either through oral sex or manual stimulation. And a happy woman is more likely to make sure her partner is happy. But, when I talk about foreplay, I am not just talking about kissing, fondling, and oral sex. I am also talking about sending each other sexy text messages, taking hot showers together, giving each other massages, holding hands in public, whispering in each others ears, and so much more. Foreplay is anything that keeps you connected and makes you WANT sex.
3. VARIETY – Variety is supposedly the “spice of life”. But, it also the biggest ingredient to an awesome sex life! If you vow to mix things up from time to time, to try new things and keep things fresh, you’ll never get bored with each other. Experiment with new positions, buy new lingerie, have sex in a different room of the house, role play, try new toys or lubes… just do anything you can to make things interesting, as often as you can! Even small changes can increase the passion in your sex life!
So speak up, spend time on each other, and mix things up! Even spending a little extra time doing these three things could add up to more fulfilling, engaging, and passionate sex.